But as much as i struggle one thing uni has taught me, is that being 'normal' doesn't exist and that regardless of what my inner voice tells me, i can be loved for exactly who i am and who cares if i am 'that girl', i am more than my mental illness and trauma.
Trigger Warning: References to suicide, grooming and substance abuse.
When i was younger, i never thought i would be 'that girl' and that i would be 'normal' but when i was groomed as a young teen, everything changed. If i was to list everything 'wrong' with me or even my experiences it is alot to handle. Bulimia nervosa, depression,overdoses, anxiety, grooming victim, miscarriage, substance abuse and my step dads death. I sed to laugh at my own experiences, because it is the only way i could cope and handle what i had been though.
Aged 13, i developed bulima nervosa as i struggled to cope and spiralled downhill with anxiety and depression. October 13th 2013 i attempted suicide for the first time aged 15 and although i got professional help, i lied my way out of it and continued my self destructive behaviour and slowly improved bt it wasn't until i came to university and relapsed again during my second year, that i finally started making progress into recovery.